Inside the job ...

I suspect nobody really cares how a sportswriter does his/her job. Well, let me put it a different way – I can’t imagine WHY anybody would care how a sportswriter does his/her job. I remember an editor once telling me that a story of mine stunk (just once?), and I started to explain to him how I’d had a rough day, my computer had gone on the blitz, my girlfriend had dumped me, a coach had refused to talk to me, I couldn’t get a phone line to send my story – I’m sure I went through a thousand excuses – and he then told me the shirt syllogism, which I still think about now (I’m not sure “syllogism” is the right word, but “shirt example” doesn’t sound nearly as good).

The shirt syllogism goes like this: If you buy a shirt with a missing button, you don’t care why. You don’t care that the guy who made the shirt was going through a nasty divorce, or that the person operating the button machine was thinking about his son or daughter in Iraq, or that the shirt factory had just laid off 230 people in order to compete with the factories that outsourced all their button-stitching jobs to Mexico. You may care about each of these things on a macro level or on a human level or not at all, but at that moment when you see the missing button – whether you’re Bill O’Reilly, Al Sharpton, Michael Moore or Ann Coulter – you only care that your damned shirt is missing a button.

Same thing here – nobody cares why a column stinks (or why it’s good, for that matter). Nobody should care. The column stands on its own. But this is a sportswriter’s blog, which means by its very nature nobody should care about anything that I write here. So I thought today it might be kind of fun to break down how I wrote Wednesday’s column about Buddy Bell winning a battle of wits with Tony La Russa. I certainly understand if you skip this one though before you leave you might want to buy a book.

(According to the meter count on this blog, more than 30,000 of you have read this blog over the last month or so. I KNOW all you haven't bought a book. You can't fool me).

Pregame: So this was Wednesday, Cardinals vs. the Royals. The first thing I like to do when I get to the park is think up a few column possibilities. Well, no, actually that's not even slightly true. The first thing I like to do is check my email, get a Diet Coke, trade insults with other sportswriters and maybe play a little computer backgammon. One day recently, a guy rolled FIVE DOUBLES IN A ROW to beat me at the end. I don’t think that had ever happened to me before.

On this day, I did actually think about some early column possibilities. I’m terrible at this. ISome very good columnists come to the park with a strong idea, do the pregame work, have the column done (more or less) by the third inning and adjust as the game goes on. This is always my plan, but I have never in my entire life achieved this goal. I just need to see how the game will play out. So what I usually do is come up three or four ideas, report a little on each of them, throw them all away, come up with new ideas, report those, throw them away, wash, rinse, repeat until it’s the eighth inning and I’m completely blank and I’m staring at a computer screen that looks like this:

By JOE POSNANSKI
The Kansas City Star

ST. LOUIS – aaaaaa , Buddy Bell walks to the m … Alex Gordon is probably the first third baseman to …
Four score and seven years a … 816-555-3925 … look up Scott Spezio’s numbers with runners in scoring … .438 on-base percentage since June 11 … “I’m tired,” he said.

And so on. My computer screen is overrun with scraps of thoughts that are not only entirely useless but meaningless too … I have no idea whose phone number that is or who had the .438 on-base percentage or who said he was tired or anything else. And I have 23 minutes to write a column, which I spend typing in some sort of panic-induced hysteria.

Anyway, on this day, three distinct ideas were in my mind:

1. Zack Greinke seems to be locked in now. I’ve been skeptical about the Royals keeping him in the bullpen – to me a 23-year-old pitcher once considered the best pitching prospect in baseball by many is just too valuable and too important to pitch in the sixth inning, especially for a team trying to get better. That said, there’s no question that this stint in the bullpen has unleashed a lion (gnashed his teeth and bit the recess lady’s breast, how could I forget?). On Wednesday, Greinke faced Albert Pujols and his first fastball registered at 100 mph on the hometown scoreboard. Now, I’m not sure he really hit 100, but he was close enough – he’s been throwing 97 and 98 consistently. He also has a biting curve and, at times, an unhittable slider. We are talking some serious stuff here. And so maybe it would be good to keep him in the pen temporarily, let him get his confidence up, let him wear Superman’s cape for a while, and then when the time’s right the Royals can decide to make him a starter or a closer or something like that.

2. John Buck has become a player. John has always been a good guy – one of those guys you wish would perform well – but he has really struggled at the plate and he’s had his issues behind the plate too. (I will say this for John: Last year he had an absolutely nightmarish Royals staff to catch – it was like Wild Pitches R Us or Buried Sliders Inc. or something. That team had 85 wild pitches – 12 of them were from Mark Redman, and 11 from Ambiorix Burgos which meant that Royals pitchers had the versatility to throw slow wild pitches AND fast ones).

Anyway, there seemed to every reason to believe that Buck would never develop into the player the Royals had hoped for. But then he came into spring training with a new look (long hair), a new swing (he lifts his right foot and drops it just before the pitch is throw as a trigger mechanism) and a determination to prove that he belongs. So far, he’s hit 13 homers in 160 at-bats which doesn’t just lead the team, it’s almost DOUBLE anybody else. And he’s walking more, he’s striking out a little less. He’s also playing more solid defense behind the plate and pitchers say he’s calling a much better game.

“He’s grown up before our eyes,” Buddy Bell said, one of those quotes a columnist writes down happily in the hope that John Buck has a big day. Buck also has had to split time with veteran Jason LaRue, even though LaRue is hitting .173 with five walks. So there was an opinion column possibility here also (Headline: Columnist says “Play Buck More!”)

3. Bob Knight was at the game. Knight is a walking-talking-raging-insulting-sarcastic column every single day of the week. Knight also grew up near my hometown, he was an Indians fan; I could have chatted a little Cleveland baseball with him (I’ve done that before actually), talked about how the game has changed, ask him how he would fix La Russa’s Cardinals – and then I could have written a column before the game even began and been sipping Margaritas by the time Todd Wellemeyer gave up his first run.

That would have been nice and easy. So of course, I didn’t do it. I have some sort of allergic reaction to easy columns, for some reason – even when the easy column is undoubtedly BETTER than the harder one. I think it’s about guilt – hell, my Dad worked in a factory all his life, my brother works in a hot kitchen at a restaurant, and I’m writing little stories about Bo Jackson. It's hard enough to sleep at night. So I didn’t do the easy Bob Knight column.

That’s what I had. So naturally I did nothing at all on any of the three columns. I talked to Buddy Bell for a long time about the old Cleveland Indians days. I did some Internet searching, finished a blog, ate dinner and then it was gametime.

The game: This was Gil Meche vs. Todd Wellemeyer, so you had to figure the Royals had at least a fighting chance. And they jumped out to a 4-1 lead. Lots of column possibilities now. The Royals had a chance to win their fourth series in a row for the first time in four years. I bring this up mainly to share the exchange on the first day of the series between an earnest young reporter and Buddy Bell.

EYR: “So Buddy, the team has a chance to win its fourth consecutive series for the first time since 2003. Is there a lot of excitement about that in the clubhouse?”
BUDDY: Huh?
EYR: Well, the team has a chance to win its fourth consecutive series, I was wondering if the guys were talking about that.
BUDDY: I didn’t know that. I don’t think anybody knew that. We’re just trying to win today’s game.
EYR: Well now that you know that you have a chance to do this, do you have any thoughts about it?
BUDDY: No.

So around the fourth inning or so, I thought about doing a general column on how the Royals have improved – and I think they have improved. They still have numerous problems, of course (one of those being that John Buck has about twice as many home runs as anyone else on the team), but their starting pitching, with Meche and Brian Bannister throwing well, has stabilized a little bit. When Alex Gordon hits (he’s hitting .423 since June 7), the lineup doesn’t seem so punchless. And with Greinke, Joakim Soria and others pitching well in the bullpen, well, we’re talking about hope here, and there seems to be some real hope.

Unfortunately, Gil Meche was not good on this night. He coughed up the lead. He's been terrific almost every time out, but he just seemed to be battling from the first inning on. Soon the score was tied. The “Royals are improving” column sort of loses steam if the Royals actually lose the game. Then, Zack Greinke came in, first and second, two outs. He blew strike three past Adam Kennedy. He ripped through the bottom of the Cardinals lineup 1-2-3 the next inning.

OK so it was Greinke. I would write Greinke. Decision made. This game was going at a Tony La Russa pace, which meant that my first deadline would probably hit before the game even ended. I had about an hour left at this point, so I started to write the Greinke column mentioned above. The next inning he gave up a single, he walked Pujols after a good battle, and then he gave up another single. He got yanked. In came Soria with the bases loaded.

And that Greinke column no longer seemed so interesting.

Soria pitched well. He coaxed a double play grounder right away and then got Chris Duncan to fly out. Maybe Soria could be the column. He’s a Rule V guy, he’s from Mexico, he’s pitched very well for most of the season. The Royals may have something pretty special with him – I think Soria could be a terrific setup man or he could be starter before too long. One baseball guy says that Soria has real potential as a starter but he might have trouble getting through a lineup the third time, but really don’t all pitchers these days have trouble the third time through except maybe Verlander, Haren, Santana and a few others? Trouble is, I considered the Soria column and realized that I really didn’t have 800 words on him.

The game wouldn’t end. The Royals led 6-5 in the eighth, and they had a lousy inning. Tony Peña booted a routine ground ball. Juan Encarnacion hit a double play grounder but second baseman Fernando Cortez threw the pivot throw into the dugout. Eventually the Royals got out of the inning without giving up a run, but now I was on deadline – I mean, right on it – and I had no choice. I threw together some mishmash of things and figured I would clean it up when the game ended, and I had a better idea what was happening.

Then came the the ninth inning. The Royals led 6-5, and Buddy Bell brought in the closer, Octavio Dotel. First batter, Aaron Miles, smacked a single – his ended up with five hits. Albert Pujols then poked a double to right, Miles scored to make it 6-6, and I was at ground zero again.

The column: I decided I would write about the battle of wits in the ninth inning. Hey I had nothing. The Cardinals had a man on second, nobody out, game on the line, and it seems to me this is the one time when managers get to play strategy games. Well, La Russa ALWAYS plays strategy games, which drives me absolutely up the wall. Last week, I saw him bring in the infield against the Royals in the FIRST INNING, and I saw him intentionally walk Mike Sweeney with a man on second and the Cards DOWN FIVE RUNS IN THE SECOND INNING. It's not important but worth point out that Mike Sweeney was hitting like .250 at the time. I’m not saying whether these moves were right or wrong – OK, yeah I am, they were wrong – but more than anything they were moves made by someone who has started to believe all the stuff George Will wrote about him.

Most managers are not like that … they understand the innate powerlessness of the job. I’m joking about La Russa, he understands that too (I think). They can’t call timeouts, can’t give fiery halftime speeches, can’t recruit and can’t talk to their coordinators who are watching the game from high above the field. That last sentence, almost word for word, was the way I started writing the column.

And then I watched the Buddy-Tony chess match. Dotel intentionally walked Scott Spezio. He then got Scott Rolen to hit into a fielder’s choice, though that did move Pujols to third with only one out. So first and third, one out, lefty Chris Duncan coming up and here we go.

Buddy went to the bullpen – he brought in lefty Jimmy Gobble. I understand that later, Cardinals postgame radio would say that Buddy brought in Gobble to try and get La Russa to pinch-hit righty Ryan Ludwick for Duncan, but that’s wrong. La Russa’s bench was down to almost nothing. If La Russa pinch hits Ludwick there, he just burns him – Buddy has Gobble intentionally walk Ludwick and the next batter is lefty Skip Schumacher. No way there's a pinch-hitter there.

So La Russa had to keep Duncan in the game. It was a nice move by Buddy there – he’s got Duncan stapled to the plate against a lefty. Duncan in his career is hitting .206 against lefties, and he does not have a single sacrifice fly (he actually does not have a single sac fly all year against lefties or righties in 200-plus plate appearances). Those odds are about as good as you can get in that situation. Then Buddy did something unusual. He had Gobble intentionally walk Duncan.

I don’t necessarily agree with the move – OK, I don’t agree with it at all – but it did get the wheels turning. La Russa pinch-hit Ludwick, and Buddy went to righty Joel Peralta. I’ll say this for Buddy – by bringing in Gobble to throw the intentional walk rather than having Dotel do it, he gave himself the option to bring in Peralta -- the one thing he did not want was a Gobble-Ludwick matchup (even though Ludwick's career average against lefties is .193). And I’ll tell you what: Peralta came out of the pen throwing some serious fire. He struck out Ludwick. And then he struck out Stinnett. Inning over. Extra innings coming.

Now, to me – Buddy wins that battle. I’m not talking about strategic brilliance here – this wasn’t exactly MacArthur plotting out the Battle of Inchon. But it worked, and that’s the only way you can judge baseball moves. So I now had 45 minutes to my final deadline, and I began writing a column about managers and how helpless they often are how much they embrace the moment when they finally have a chance to leave their imprint on a game. I was waiting for something else to happen, to be quite honest.

But nothing else DID happen. The game went into the 10th, then the 11th, then the 12th, and nobody was scoring, nobody was doing anything interesting, the greatest fans in baseball left, and my deadline passed. They called from the paper: “What do you have?”

What do I have? Nothing. I had written a Bell-La Russa battle of wits column – all the while wishing that I had just talked to Bob Knight before the game. Some days you have to just go with what you’ve got. I hoped there were a couple of decent lines in it, and I sent it in. About 45 minutes later – long after any hope of fixing the column has passed – Buddy Bell had run out of pitchers and was forced to use Friday starter Jorge de la Rosa. On de la Rosa’s fourth pitch, Ryan Ludwick blasted a long home run to win the game for St. Louis in the 14th inning. Ludwick does hit with power against lefties.

The aftermath: The next morning, there were a couple dozen emails from people explaining to me in pretty specific terms why I’m an idiot. These kept coming in throughout the day. This is not uncommon. Hey, I can’t blame them. I had written a column about how Buddy Bell had outflanked Tony La Russa when, in the end, La Russa had won out. What can you do? Like my editor said long ago, nobody cares why the shirt is missing a button.